KKSmith.net

This is the first time today that I have taken the time to sit down and write. I spent much of my time today cleaning my bedroom and bathroom with few breaks in between. Partly because I want to begin the new year fresh, but mostly because it was easier to stay busy today rather than feel sorry for myself because Kristin is not here. I miss her so much.
And I am thankful for this message board so her memory can go on and I am reminded of just how may lives she touched in her 14 years. I come to this webpage often to read what others have posted. Although I don’t always write it’s good to know that I can when I need to.
It’s hard to explain but sometimes I forget she isn’t here even after two years and then suddenly the realization will hit me. I get sad when there’s something that I wish I could tell her but then I have to remember that she already knows because she is looking upon all of us.
Today I reflect on what has happend but I am thankful for all of the great memories that I have to go along with the sad. I remember how full of life she was and the way that she would get excited about something she would be telling me. I still remember the last time I actually talked to her. It was Christmas Day and she had called me to tell me about the presents she had opened that morning. Even over the phone I could hear the excitement in her voice and I could picture her smile. Today, one of the things I miss most is her hugs. No one else has ever been able to give me a hug that could compare with one from Kristin.

Not finding the words from deep within my soul that would take away the pain of remembering this day two years ago, I will just say I love each one of you.

My prayer is that in the coming year each of us will be strengthened by our love for one another and our faith in God. Let’s all make Kristin so proud!

Mom/Grandma/Friend

A couple of weeks ago I was talking on the phone to my Aunt. We were discussing grief and I mentioned things that occur in my day-to-day life that “triggers” strong reminders of Kristin that cause me to be sad. She asked what types of things those were. I said for example when I hear the song “My Favorite Things” (from the classic movie “Sound of Music”), I have a hard time fighting back tears because that was one of the two songs Kristin sang for us on Christmas Eve 2000, the last time that I saw her alive.

Aunt Kay suggested that I look at these little events in a different way… she said that instead of letting them remind me of the loss, I should view these episodes as Kristin’s spirit speaking to me, reminding me of where she is and how joyful it must be there.

Well tonight is the 2nd anniversary of the day Kristin entered her Heavenly home and what do I find on ABC-TV? Yes, “The Sound of Music” is playing on network television. I don’t think I have the strength yet to watch the movie as I’m still struggling with this concept, but in my heart I know that it is much more than coincidence that the movie would be playing today, of all days.

Kristin… I hear you speaking to me and I love you.

-Aunt Shelly

MY FAVORITE THINGS

Raindrops on roses,
And whiskers on kittens,

Bright copper kettles,
And warm woollen mittens,

Brown paper packages,
Tied up with strings,

These are a few of my favorite things . . .

Cream colored ponies,
An’ crisp apple strudels,

Doorbells an’ sleigh bells,
An’ schnitzel with noodles,

Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings,

These are a few of my favorite things . . .

Girls in white dresses,
With blue satin sashes,

Snow flakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes,

Silver white winters, That melt into springs,

These are a few of my favorite things . . .

When the dog bites,
When the bee stings,

When I’m feelin’ sad,

I simply remember my favorite things,

And then I don’t feel so bad . . .

Roses….hmmm kittens…
Kettles…….mittens….

La dee da, la dee da,
La dee da, da,

These are a few of my favorite things . . .

When the dog bites,
When the bee stings,

When I’m feelin’ sad,

I simply remember my favorite things,

And little by little my heavy heart sings . . .

And then I don’t feel so bad . . .

~ from “The Sound of Music” 1959, 1965

Music by Richard Rodgers and lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein II

I have to admit, I’ve never posted on this site before. In fact, I’ve only been a member for ten minutes. But I’ve been thinking about Krissy a lot lately, and I guess I just wanted to reflect a little.

I’ve gone through a tragedy in my own life recently, which has caused me to question many things. Among these questions was that of why God does the things He does, including taking Krissy from us. I thought of what she would have done if she were here; how she would have helped me, but I didn’t have to think hard. I knew. Krissy would have hugged me and told me she was there for me and been the best friend she could have been. She would taken me out to the movies or for ice cream when I was feeling low, and done the best she could to cheer me up. That was the type of person she was. She was a caring person, an honest person, and a loving person – all the ingredients needed for a true friend, the kind everyone needs and a lucky few have. That was the type of person Krissy was…

…she truely touched my life.

Me and kristin didn’t always get along we were more like sisters than cousins. We would have our laughs and or fights. Kristin, Amber, and Aunt Taryn would come down for a week during the summer and we would have water gun fights and play with my doll houses. it is really strange that kristin is gone i mean no body comes down anymore and i can’t have the closes thing to a sister as i had with her. i love kristin and always will and will never forget the tragedy that took her away from us. But atleast she is with her father now.

Dear Taryn,
This is a very nice site and memorial for your daughter. Thank you for continuing to share her life and what she means to you with others. One of these days we will be crossing to the other side of the state, perhaps take in a compassionate friends meeting over there, or somehow meet. Until then, see you at groww and will keep you in my prayers.

The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting ceremony takes place this Sunday, December 8, 2002. People world-wide are encouraged to light a candle for one hour begining at 7:00 p.m. (in your own time zone) in memory of a child who has died. There will be a message board on the Compassionate Friends website for anyone to share thoughts on Dec. 8.

Mom and Dad,

The bench at church is just beautiful. It was neat to see all those sweet little children playing nearby. Thanks for making today a very special day. We have so much to be thankful for.

Love,
Shelly

Dear Kristin: YOU ARE LOVED AND MISSED!!